Saturday, June 7, 2008
hey people.i seriously have no mood to study at all.
all i wanna do is to slp slp and slp
aint feeling well this few days.
i dont know why.but ya.
thursday went bowling with benny and yan ting (did i spell ur name correctly?)
hahas.
friday slpt for the whole day then met qy for dinner
saturday was supposed to be my study day
but i cant study at all
studied gp and went home to slp
i think i feel super sick
everytime someone mentions this topic
it just switches the emo part of me
and iim really emo-ic now
i can feel it
he said 'you are my sweetest addiction'
i said 'you are too'
now this white lie is no longer true.
the lies you fabricated
the pain thats in me
the torture i had been true
iim imune to everything
life just aint the same
i thought i could forget
but what lies deep inside me
is still a picture of you
you occupy whats left in my heart
and leaving no space for myself.
behind every smile
there is a sad story
and behind every laughter
there is a story not worth crying for
the chapter has long gone
the book is sealed
and its stored deep down inside my heart
but everytime he is mentioned
that book breaks open
and millions and millions of sad memories resurface
i try surpressing my feeling
making smiles and laughter my facade
its too late.
the damage is done
and its tough cramping my sorrows beneath those smiles
iim human too.
i have feelings.
i dont always smile and laugh
just gimmi a second
stop
and let the world revolve around me
i will still prefer to keep a small secret inside me
it hurts
i cant keep secrets
and iim crying inside
struggling
waiting for someone to turn off the emo side of me
its hard for me to trust anyone.
i did trust you
but what did you repay me with
just loads and loads of craps that make my eyes swollen
i cry easily
trust is to be build.
life is not what it seems to be
those lovely lies you fabricated
are just so disturbing.
now the book is opened
and making it seal would take another month
pouring my sorrows over you aint just gonna work
you will get tired of me
and you leave me beside a rubbish bin and tells me its good for me
ii have brains.
i wont just take what you give
iim holding on to a pen
not knowing what to write on a new chapter
i cried so hard
the ink smudged and the book went soggy
for a second i was happy that you are gone
for good
but memories just flushed down like waterfall
flooding all my thoughts
and making me think of nothing but you.
i tried forcing you out
different means and ways are just not helping
my new life will not be filled with you
it would be filled with someone else
HIM <3
i have never revealed my darkest secret.
its tough.
trusting someone is as tough too.
my life aint gonna revolve around you.
iim going to change
iim looking forward to the new HIM
my life aint just gonna end here
i promise (: